Creating safety with young people questioning, leaving, or changing faith.

Professionals working with young people and families are alert to abuse, violence, exploitation and online harms.

But do we have practice for when young people experience changes in belief?

When a young person questions their faith or decides to leave a faith organisation, do we have a response if their decision puts them at odds with family and community?

A few months ago, Sarah Robbins, Chair of Birmingham Humanists, CEO of The Springfield Project, and friend of Resonant Collaboration, drew our attention to this important topic.

At first, we thought we were exploring a relatively narrow concern: safeguarding young apostates, those who leave or renounce a faith, religion, or political loyalty. However, as we started conversations with experts by experience, researchers and national leads, it became clear to us that the picture is wider.

A range of young people are facing harms when their faith changes, and when changes collide with family, community or high-control religious expectations. This is about what happens when young people change their relationship with faith, including where their beliefs strengthen or they decide to change to a new faith, or to no faith. In these situations, young people can face stereotypes, bias, and racism, depending on contexts and backgrounds.

Over the last year, we have been speaking with practitioners and colleagues, who have shared with us stories about young people questioning, leaving, and changing faith, including all those who…

…no longer believe but are terrified that saying so will mean rejection from families and communities, and could mean losing their homes.

…are trying to leave high-control faith groups, where relationships, decisions and sources of information have been tightly controlled and managed.

…have left, and as a result, have experienced separation from family and community, a loss of structures and beliefs that had shaped their previous lives, and find themselves isolated and unmoored. 

…have made a change to a new faith, and have been subjected to false assumptions they have been radicalised, without due professional curiosity and support proportionate to their circumstances.

…are exploring their emerging LGBTQ+ identities, which may clash with religious teachings that understand them as sinful or disordered.

These are safety and welfare questions, and in practice, they can be minimised or overlooked as everyday family conflict or theological concerns, outside the safeguarding remit. This includes, and is not limited to, those young people who leave high-control religious organisations such as Jehovah’s Witnesses, Scientology and other groups that survivors and researchers have described as regulating behaviour, belief, identity and relationships in intensive ways. We are also thinking about everyday situations where a young person’s beliefs change, and their family or community finds this hard to tolerate.

Why do these issues matter?

Research and lived experience point to some examples of emotional abuse, coercive control (Mulvihill et al 2022), shunning and ostracism (Grendele, Bapir-Tardy & Flax 2024), and “honour-based” harm (Bhatia et al 2024) when young people question or step away from a faith tradition. Those trying to exit high-control religious contexts talk about social exclusion, loss of all family contact, homelessness and profound disruption to identity and belonging.

LGBTQ+ young people can find themselves at a particularly sharp intersection: some face family rejection, others are forced toward conversion practices (Jones et al 2021), which are religious or secular attempts to change or suppress their sexual orientation or gender identity. Sometimes there is no explicit conversion effort at all, but instead a drip-feed of pressure from social and cultural norms to deny or hide who they are.

Surprisingly, there is very little national guidance that names these experiences. We have a National Action Plan on abuse linked to faith or belief, and some faiths have procedures that touch on spiritual abuse. But there has been little sustained attention since 2012 to embed this in local safeguarding systems. A decade and a half of austerity has stripped out youth, community and support services that might otherwise hold this kind of relational work.

Safeguarding and support in cases where young people are questioning, leaving, or changing faith, particularly from high-control religions, is barely visible in statutory guidance documents. And, what’s more concerning, the transition at 18 often feels less like a step and more like a deep trench between child and adult services systems, just as potential harms around housing, mental health and isolation may intensify.

Schools, colleges and universities

Education settings sit in the middle of this. Schools, further education colleges and universities are where many young people first voice their doubts about faith or think and share feelings about their LGBTQ+ identity with trusted teachers, youth workers or peers. At the same time, staff in education describe a perfect storm of safeguarding, welfare and pastoral demands and curriculum pressures: Ofsted, Prevent, British Values, mental health roles, online harms, typically squeezed into PSHE and RE.

We know that the most genuine conversations about emerging feelings about change and identity might happen in corridor chats, drama rehearsals, after lessons, or other ‘soft’ spaces. However, fears about being labelled ignorant, racist, Islamophobic, anti-faith or anti-parent can make it feel safer not to touch these questions at all. The project we are developing aims to recognise and work with these complexities in the real lives of young people, families, communities, education and youth settings.

Resonant Collaboration builds on our Creating Conducive Conditions (CCCs) framework for relational youth safeguarding: the idea that good practice depends upon the conditions around practitioners, managers, and leaders, including relational system leadership, reflective supervision, organisational culture and multi-agency relationships. All of this is needed to support resonance with young people’s lived experience, and effective collaboration between multi-agency partners that prioritises nurture of young people’s awareness and agency.

So what are we planning to do?

Resonant Collaboration is bringing together existing research and experience about apostasy, high-control religion, religious harm and abuse, conversion practices and youth safeguarding, and we connect it with knowledge from Contextual Safeguardingand Transitional Safeguarding. We are collating helpful resources and organisations and drafting principles and reflective questions that we hope can grow and travel between services, settings and sectors.

By convening conversations with young people, youth work practitioners, local safeguarding children partnerships, faith and community leaders, teachers, and adults with lived experience of questioning, leaving, or changing faith, we aim to surface real and sometimes tough questions, like:

  • What is this young person afraid might happen if they speak, and what are they hoping for?

  • Who is already supportive in a young person's life, and how can we support them to turn to a safe haven, when home does not feel like a safe place to talk?

  • When does concern that comes from love and care begin to compromise a young person's rights or safety?

  • How do we work alongside and in partnership with families who are fearful of losing their child, taking that fear seriously without making assumptions, colluding with control or excusing harm?

  • How do we act responsibly, proportionately and anti-oppressively, while seeking to recognise and respond to signs of violence, threats, control or abuse?

One-day conference in Birmingham 21 October 2026

We have decided to start our work with Birmingham. The city’s religious and cultural diversity, its history of debates around faith and education, and the strength of the voluntary, faith, community and youth sectors make it an ideal place to think this through.

We are working with our partners across Birmingham, including youth, community and faith networks, as well as national survivor-informed groups such as Faith to Faithless from Humanists UK.

On Wednesday, 21 October 2026, we will host a one-day conference at Fazeley Studios in Birmingham focused on creating safety and promoting welfare with young people questioning, leaving, or changing faith.

In Resonant Collaboration style, this won’t be just another safeguarding training...

We aim to create a space where people can:

  • hear from young people, researchers, practitioners, and people with lived experience,

  • grow our collective knowledge about this topic

  • reflect on practice in education, faith and community settings,

  • explore how Transitional Safeguarding and Contextual Safeguarding help us see this topic clearly, and

  • begin to sketch out what more resonant and collaborative responses could look like locally.

We would love to hear from you…

We are keen to hear from people who recognise these dynamics in their own work, in education settings, youth work, social care, health, faith and community organisations, and survivor networks.

If you would like to share information about your services on a stall at the conference, or share research and resources on this topic, please get in touch.


Glossary

References

Bhatia, A., Lokot, M., Kenny, L., Mathpati, M. and Cislaghi, B. (2024) ‘Honor, violence, and children: A systematic scoping review of global evidence’, Child Abuse & Neglect, 151, p. 106642. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chiabu.2024.106642

Grendele, W.A., Bapir-Tardy, S. & Flax, M. (2024). Experiencing Religious Shunning: Insights into the Journey From Being a Member to Leaving the Jehovah’s Witnesses Community.Pastoral Psychol 73, 43–61 https://doi.org/10.1007/s11089-023-01074-y

Jones, T., Power, J., Hill, A.O., Despott, N., Carman, M., Jones, T.W., Anderson, J. and Bourne, A. (2021) ‘Religious conversion practices and LGBTQA+ youth’, Sexuality Research and Social Policy, 19(1), pp. 1155–1164. https://doi.org/10.1007/s13178-021-00615-5

Mulvihill, N., Aghtaie, N., Matolcsi, A., & Hester, M. (2022). UK victim-survivor experiences of intimate partner spiritual abuse and religious coercive control and implications for practice. Criminology & Criminal Justice, 23(5), 773-790. https://doi.org/10.1177/17488958221112057

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Strengthening your response to harm outside the home: a collaborative, hands-on approach